After suffering from bulimia for two years - I was signed off from a treatment programme Autumn 2013. Since I have been really, really proud of myself for going from binging/purging at least 5 times a week to one every couple of weeks, even once a month in my controlled times/ happier periods. I then suffered a rough relationship and break up due to cheating in June where I relapsed quite badly for a couple of weeks. With the support of my friends and family I was able to become more level-headed and gained more control over the situation.
I have started an amazing career in my dream job and I have been seeing someone wonderfully supportive for the past month. As we were having sex on a regular basis (and my periods were causing me a lot of discomfort in my work) - I chose to visit my local health centre. They are aware of my history with bulimia and I was prescribed Cerazette / the mini pill. They said to just ensure that I didn't purge 3 hours after I took the pill to ensure I stay protected.
I feel like a complete idiot for not looking into the side effects of hormonal pills - but in the past I responded well to the combined pills before my eating disorder and so I didn't think this would be a problem.
After a week I suffered from ridiculous hunger and cravings during the days, which was almost unbearable as I keep a food diary and balanced diet as part of my recovery. I have also had a LOT of water retention - I do understand this could pass but my self esteem and mood has had an incredibly bad punch. I have been feeling swings of extremely low periods for the past couple of days.
Due to the (what feels like extremely sudden) weight gain I have had severe temptations to purge and is becoming very stressful. I've been exercising excessively in the evenings in order to refrain from purging -
I am going to stop taking it tomorrow - but I am now really struggling to fight the urges because I have managed to stop myself from b/p in almost TWO months.
I'm so stressed!
Dear cAxford,
First all, CONGRATULATIONS on the progress you "have" made. You should be very proud of the positive steps you have made towards reclaiming the life you deserve ~ one free of an ED! Also, what an absolutely exciting time in your life; to be working at your dream job and to also be in a wonderfully supportive relationship.
I can understand how challenging it must be as your body is naturally trying to adjust to the changes the pill/hormones can create. You're right, the water retention will resolve itself. I would still encourage you to share these concerns with your ob/gyn and therapist (if you have one!?!). Perhaps there's an alternative birth control option you may want to explore and discuss with your physician.
I would encourage you to contact the NEDA Helpline #1.800.931.2237 (Mon. - Thurs. 9am - 9pm/Fri. 9am - 5pm/EST). They are a tremendous resource for ANY ED-related questions or concerns. I'm sure they can provide some additional insight and recommendations as well. If you don't currently have a therapist, they can help locate one in your area for you.
Another great resource to consider is the NEDA Navigator program! This free program connects you with a volunteer who has experience in recovery and is there to listen, support, and advise you along the way!! I think it is a great way to receive absolutely sincere support! Here is a link to learn more!
https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/neda-navigators
Here are a few additional links I hope you find of interest:
Recovery and relapse prevention: http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/recovery-and-relapse-prevention
Stories of Hope: http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/stories-of-hope
Keep up the GREAT work and progress. You're so worth it!
Please let us know how we can continue to support you. We're here for you ~ you're NOT alone!
HEAL~ing Hugs,
Legacy of Love
Recently started the pill again. This is my third day going X calories over maintenance. Just feel ashamed and can't wait to be done with this pack. We will get through this
Welcome to the forums Claim_stakerWe are glad that you are finding support here on the NEDA forums. A portion of your post was edited due to the mention of numbers that may be triggering to other forum members. Our community guidelines are always available to review here http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/community-guidelines. In the event you need further assistance please call the NEDA helpline at 1-800-931-2237 (M-Th 9-9 F 9-5 EST).Again, thank you for posting, and we hope you will continue to do so!
You're struggling, but please take out the calories. They are triggering. Thank you.