National Eating Disorders Association

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I am just tired. I am tired of how much my ED takes out of me. I am tired of trying to figure how much is me and what my ED has contributed to my personality. I am scared of what will be left of me. It has become so ingrained in me and I don't know how to start anymore. Besides how I plan things around it and how vocal I have become about it to the people in my life. It is the one constant in my life.
And the more honest I am about it to my friends and family, the more ashamed I am. It leads me right back to pretending it's just a diet and a weird set of habits I have.
I got into a big argument with a close friend about it, and as soon the topic came about I was ostracized. It was so upsetting I wanted to give up. Because apparently just voicing it out means I am "not over it".

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