National Eating Disorders Association

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when you have abuse

Hi guys,

I am troubled because my sister, a victim of sexual abuse, was talking wit me today. She said if I was abused I would remember it. I said not necessarily so. I told her every hospital and therapist I have had said I have been abused. She said I would remember it. There are so many symptoms to describe why they believe this. She continued to want to talk about this but I said we should shut the conversation down. She said I was being rebellious because I would not mention certain words.

On the other hand, she came over to my folks house where I am staying while they are away. She is watching over me while I am sick and helping me to put and allow my body heal. Things have gotten better with us but she got mad at me. But we are now watching a movie together.

I just don't understand why she is so insistent on telling me nothing happened to me. I told her I am working on this in therapy. She likes to always be right. She is not in this situation.

Thank you for listening.

I am doing okay but a little down these days. I hope you all are doing okay.

I am so sorry

Recently my mom told me my dad never did anything to me. It made me feel like maybe she was right, but then I started having flashbacks that convinced me otherwise.
Maybe your sister saw what was done, knows what happened, perhaps she was the perpetrator, or wants to convince you and herself otherwise so she doesn't feel guilty or at fault. I hope this makes sense. Again, I'm really sorry for this part of your life.
I was the same way until about 10 years ago when one specific memory of my dad started, then more started coming last September (2016).
At one point, I stopped talking to my parents because my dad was in the same house as my mom and I couldn't handle it.
I am sorry you are feeling down. I will pray for the sexual abuse past.
I hope this response is helpful. I would give you a big hug right now, but the best I can do is give you a hug through this post. (((((((((Hugs)))))).
Hopefully you will be feeling better soon.


Hi, your response is kind and gentle. She herself is a victim of abuse, her child was taken away when he was only two years old while he was in the hospital. Her two husbands were abusive, she herself was raped, and several abusive male friends. So she remembers and thinks I should. But I just don't. So thank you for your response. I appreciate it.


I don't have much to offer

I don't have much to offer just my support. I am sorry it is difficult you don't remember I have a history of sexual abuse it is a very difficult thing and painful I am sorry you are going through this and your sister is pushing you. go at your own pace and work with your therapist. my best thoughts to you and i hope all is ok soon.