National Eating Disorders Association

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hermione3
Weird vacation eating...

On vacation but have ate really weird following my friends lead and I don't know if she has disordered eating but I know I am not eating enough...like yesterday she didn't wake up for breakfast then didn't eat until dinner so I did the same she finished her meal I was too full but I know not what I need she also had a snack last night I get full fast...Today has been a weird day food wise too we ate breakfast and are going to have dinner later but no lunch and weird I sampled non alcoholic drinks at the weekend Ian at and a few other full drinks it just has me so off and I need to be on track I knew the weekend would be weird but my friend does not know of my anorexia... it makes me wonder if she struggles with food too or just didn't want to spend much money I can't say but I am all off and still scared to weigh myself when I get home and seeing the eating disorder specialist doctor Tuesday I just didn't want to weigh too much stupid I know....just this weekend has me freaked out...

julesthefox
I'm sorry the weekend was so

I'm sorry the weekend was so hard for you. I think it's amazing that you've gone without weighing yourself though! I know it makes you anxious, but that has to feel good too! To be able to eat with a little more freedom... I know it will be difficult, but may I suggest keeping that trend going? What I mean is, why not try not using the scale when you get home? Maybe this little break is the final push you needed to finally destroying that evil number machine. I think you can do it. You have proven you are strong enough, and you are worth far, far more than any number.
I'm sorry it was weird with your friend. Try to remember that every one and every body has different needs. It sounds like you may need to try to listen to yours a little closer throughout the day instead of modeling after others. I know hunger cues can be way off with ED, but it sounds like you do have a general idea of what you need and a meal plan. Fight off that nasty ED and nourish your beautiful body! You deserve it. And no one, I repeat, no one will judge you for taking care of yourself.
Stay strong,
Julesthefox

hermione3
Thanks for the support it

Thanks for the support it will be hard not to weigh mysel I should just leave it to the professionals and trust them and trust my meal plan I followed my friend this weekend even though it went against what I know I need. I don't really have hunger cues I follow a schedule with my meal plan it's still difficult . I am scared not to weigh myself to see what the weekend did or whatever but I will try. I have to ditch the scale it only hinders my efforts at recovery. My therapist even said she could tell I was trying based on my voice the other day I sound different when giving up she said. I also have another motivation a mother of a child I used to teach asked me to babysit I have been waiting for this so excited!

hermione3
I weighed myself :( but i am

I weighed myself :( but i am happy I am i lost weight on vacation i knew it wasn't enough I am actually happy i lost but unhappy because i am not supposed to lose more so I know i have to follow my meal plan but i am seeing the eating disorder specialist medical doctor on Tuesday and want to look valid if that makes sense even though i know she will believe me. my psychiatrist already gave her a heads up on me and said i was a sweet girl which i appreciated. it was nice to say that i love my treatment team.