You may have some questions for a treatment provider that you may prefer to ask privately, without your family member nearby. The following are some questions that other parents and loved ones have found useful to ask when the eating disorder sufferer is out of earshot. Be aware that the clinician may not be able to provide you with an answer on the spot and may need time to get back to you. If you are not satisfied with their answers, ask the treatment provider to clarify their responses, or find another clinician. Do not let a treatment provider push you to the background or be dismissive of your concerns.
How can I support my loved one’s recovery?
- Which books, websites, and other resources should I read about eating disorders?
- How often will I be updated on his/her progress?
- What is the best method to use to contact you with concerns I might have between sessions?
- What should I do if my child is unable or unwilling to participate in treatment?
- Can my loved one be admitted to treatment involuntarily? What are the criteria for making those decisions? What steps would need to be taken?
- What will happen if my loved one needs a higher level of care? How will that decision be made?
- (if a loved one is temporarily living at a facility) How should I prepare for my loved one’s return home?
- What are common signs of self-harming behavior?
- How do I prevent self-harming in my loved one?
- What are signs that my family member is purging? Exercising in secret? Hiding/throwing away food?
- How do I prevent purging at home and at school/ elsewhere?
- What steps should I take if I discover my loved one is purging?
- How do I prevent excessive or compulsive exercise?
- What steps should I take if I discover my loved one exercising?
- How can I help my child tackle his/her “fear foods”? How can I help expand the foods he/she is willing to eat?
- What happens if my loved one refuses a meal or snack? What happens next?
- What should I do if I discover my loved one is binge eating? If I interrupt them mid-binge?
- How do I respond if I discover eating disorder paraphernalia (scales, diet pills, measuring tapes, etc.) that my loved one has hidden or is using?
- Should I monitor my child’s computer usage? What sites should I be on the lookout for?
- What should I do if my family member does not want to discuss his/her eating disorder or treatment with me?
- What should I do if my loved one says they want to pursue recovery their own way, or that they will eat when they are ready? How can I help them work towards recovery and keep them safe?
- If my family member is obsessed with food, cooking, or fitness, how can I best limit these activities?
- What can I do if my family member wants to dictate the family’s eating or food habits? How do I set appropriate boundaries?
- Is it a good idea for my loved one to have a job related to food or exercise while they are recovering?
- Should my family member be involved at all in grocery shopping, or meal planning and preparation?
- If my loved one needs to gain weight, approximately how much weight should they gain per week?
- What kind of support should I provide to my family member during refeeding?
- What treatment provider will be responsible for weighing my family member? If you want me to weigh my child at home, what procedures should I follow?
- How do I provide support during mealtimes?
- What should I do if my loved one experiences aggressive or impulsive behavior during treatment?
- What are signs of a medical or psychiatric emergency? Who should I call? When should I take my loved one to the emergency room or call 911?