National Eating Disorders Association

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Nerwen_Aldarion
My Truth

Around and around the circle continues
Screaming and shouting but no one hears
Do this do that but they don't understand
So tired of listening, hiding the fears

Help is a hard word to swallow
Even harder to admit and harder to find
A mask is a friend and a comfort
Blurring and blurring that fine line

Don't let them see don't let them see
Don't let it show, pretend it's all right
Pretend to change but don't really mean it
Nothing is different, nothing is right

Try and try but keep hitting a wall
Slipping and slipping further away
But ears are shut eyes are blind
So I keep dying day by day

Silence is the only answer
No other words will do
I keep my pain to myself
And show the lie as truth

You're wrong, you're wrong, you're wrong
But no one will tell me what is right
How can I change? How can I feel?
When darkness still covers your sight

No one will see no one will see
What they do not want to face
So I keep on with what I do
Until I disappear with out a trace

I've tried. My family says words but don't mean them. The therapists I've contacted won't contact me back. No one is close, no one wants to help and I don't know what to do anymore. Everyone tells me I'm wrong, I'm wrong, I'm wrong...but no one will help me set things right. Not even here.

michael26
I'm here to help!!

Hey there!!! Thank you so much for feeling comfortable sharing your feelings with us on these forums!

I am sad that you feel hopeless and like no one is there to help. I want to reassure you that there are people who truly, sincerely wish to help you!!!! I know it is sometimes hard to work through past experiences, but please can we maybe try to walk towards trusting compassionate people again? We are truly here to support you.

I am concerned by your post regarding your safety. Are you feeling unsafe? If so, please know that there is more than one option with those feelings. Please know that you are worthy and deserving of a happy, fulfilling life!!! If you need help, please post here or call one of these numbers:

911 - If you feel unsafe and unsure if you can stay safe
1-800-273-8255 - Suicide Helpline
1-800-366-8288 - Self Harm Helpline

Is there something that you would like to talk about, or anything I can help you with? Please let me know how you're doing!

Stay safe!!! You are strong!!!!

Nerwen_Aldarion
I can't get help and I don't

I can't get help and I don't know how to stop. My family chooses to ignore rather than help and the times I've been honest have ended with my mom storming out and my father just insisting that nothing is really wrong with me.

I was sent a list of therapists through this site but none have contacted me back or have been willing to help me.

I'm losing hope that I can be fixed.

haleyan31
Nerwen_Aldarion,

There is hope! You can be fixed and you can live a happy life again. Getting to that happiness take time and perseverance. I know that may be hard when you want to get better as soon as possible but once you go through that time, you will realize how worth it all of it was.

You have already been given the different resources that you can use so I won't bore you with all that information again. But all of those sources are really helpful!

I'm just asking you to not give up hope. We all want to see you get better and it hurts knowing the pain you are going through. Stay strong! Keep up the hard work and don't give up!

Haley

prisoner_of_hope
I really related to your poem

I really related to your poem. Did you write that?

I'm sorry you're struggling abs feeling alone. I how you find support son

Support all around you <3

Your poem was extremely well written! Thank you for sharing. It can be really hard to feel like you are in the darkness, especially if you feel alone. So it is really great that you opened up to the online forum and shared how you felt!

I just wanted to make sure that you are aware that you will have support around you and people for you wherever you go! NEDA is always here to help you.

You can always call the helpline number : Monday-Thursday from 9:00 am - 9:00 pm and Friday from 9:00 am - 5:00 pm (EST)
1-800-931-2237. Someone will pick up and talk to you at any time between those times!

You can also chat on the helpline by leaving a message. And of course, the online forums are always here for you.

All the Best!