National Eating Disorders Association

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i don't know if anyone will even see this or if this is a relatable thing, but i'm trying to come to terms with the fact that i really do have disordered eating habits and a disordered view of my body and i'm doing my best to limit the harmful behaviors that i so easily fall into, but the one thing that i cannot get over is my hatred towards the person who i feel caused/triggered this all to happen.

like, i've always hated how i look, and i've always had an iffy relationship with food, but it had never been bad until i started being friends with someone earlier this year who always made stupid comments on how she ate too much that day or she would brag about how she had barely eaten anything in the past 24 hours. and it wasn't until she came into my life that i started dramatically restricting what food i ate and how much i ate. and i finally realized that she was the one who triggered this whole thing and i HATE her for it. i feel so much resentment towards her for doing this to me.

idk, i just want to know if this is something that other people have experienced or if its just me trying to shift the blame onto someone else instead of taking accountability for it myself.

Try Therapy to work it all out, it helps

There are levels of recovery and grieving, like a pyramid:


These are phases in healing as well as in grieving or processing anger w/ yourself and others.
Therapy helps u to make a smoother transition through these phases of recovery.

Good Luck and Best Wishes in ED Recovery and in Letting go of any Anger issues towards people who have affected, or harmed you in any way.