National Eating Disorders Association

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CASACERA
just have to say it outside of myself

the meal (lunch) is over...that's it till dinner...no subliminal messages to "have just this or that" which always leads me down a grazing "nibbleland". This is the only thing in my life at this moment to help myself. To make it through this one day without overeating. Remember these words, CC...

Annet
How are u doing?

Hi Casacera,

How did it go? I wonder if you usually feel anxious about something and the way you find to calm that anxiety down is by grazing? Sometimes, when I am very anxious, I feel like eating sweet things. Practicing some mindfulness exercises (you can find them out in the internet) helps me a bit.
Other things that have helped me avoid bingeing or just eating when I should not are:
a) Postponing the binge... Urges become less and less as time goes by. Just tell yourself, you will eat all that you want within 10 minutes, then 20, then 30 and so on. Eventually, you will realize, that after 20 or 30 minutes, you just do not feel like bingeing.
Other times, I go out for a walk. Sometimes the fresh air helps me distract from my bingeing urges.
The above are just some ideas. Keep working hard on this. Things can be better.
Hugs
Annet

CASACERA
Thank you Annet, lunch was fine but

not dinner. I must hang on despite hungry messages till dinner, at least 6 or later if possible. So, my plan since I just finished lunch is to post before dinner, when the fixation on what am I going to eat and how soon can I eat fills my brain, and then, immediately after as well.r I often think of that announcement phrase at the racetrack (the flats), "the horses are at the post". That's me. can't wait till the eating gate flies open. It's being able to come to this site and state my emergency panic that seems to be a savior right now. CC

CASACERA
And I can feel the hunger rumblings now

After 5 but need to wait about an hour to put my dinner together and not have my food addicted head leap around all over the place. My plan is to immediately after finishing to come here again and post and state it! To say it outside of myself, not to keep it safely hidden somehow. Keeping my eating addiction private in any way is perpetuating it. This, my overeating disorder is so powerful and entrenched. Put light on it, expose it and give me a chance at keeping "damage to a minimum" as I said in my poem. CC

Annet
You can do it, Casacera!!

You can do it, Casacera!! Although is good that you adjust yourself to regular meal times, never let the hunger be too much. Otherwise, it will be pretty easy to eat more than the needed. I'd say if at 5:40 pm you are feeling hungry enough to have your dinner, go ahead. And before eating, maybe you can try a relaxation exercise so you get to your dining room feeling less anxious and thinking less about food.

Hugs to u
Annet

CASACERA
I'm here Annet, YAY!

Don't think there wasn't a little voice trying to drown out my prior commitment. You mentioned catching my breath, breathing etc. Nothing takes the place of my food drive except I only asked myself to do one thing that I COULD do because it's at the same instant that the food drive hit. I don't know how else to describe this except that it's so hard core. Now let's see what happens. And if the urge sneaks up on me again I must repeat this for my precious peace of mind. CC

CASACERA
like I feared...back

but must throw more cold water on my face so to speak. So hard, stay conscious and keep your goal in mind...means so much. CC

Annet
Go for it!

The more consecutive days you are able to do it, the easier it will be and the better you will feel. I am with you!

CASACERA
Dear Annet (3 days)

Right now I would consider it a huge victory to continue on. I actually need to eat a lighter day, health yes but I am feeling weighed down. CC

Annet
Keep trying!

Hi Casacera,

There will always be better and worse days, easier and more difficult ones. However, we need to learn to face all of them. Some days, we will do it for ourselves. Other days, we will have to do it for someone else (ie. your commitment to a friend, therapist, family member, your pet, etc.).

The best is to keep trying. Really. I still remember when I was able to achieve 2 weeks without binging. My body used to feel GREAT. I also used to lose weight. My mood was better. My health, too!

Same with my bulimia.

Nowadays, I feel very good with myself if I am able to have my 3 meals with 1 or 2 snacks, if I do not over-exercise and I do not vomit.

I do not vomit often. I do not overexercise often. I usually eat well. So, practice makes mastery.
Is it still difficult? Yes! But when I see the long way I have come, I feel pretty well :)

I do not want to cause any additional damage to my body. My body is the one that has been suffering all these years due to my behaviors...

You can do it! I am here with you!

Let me know how today went on.

Annet

CASACERA
so far so good

but have to wait till 6:30 for din-din. Drinking a lot of water. Hard for me. Exhausted by constipation. Everyone has solutions and suggestions but none work for me. No motility in my colon.
Yuck. CC

Annet
Hi Casacera,

Have you talked to your doctor about your constipation? Wondering if this might be a health consequence from past behaviors. Maybe it would help to check it with him. By reading your post, I can feel your anxiety to eat. It sounds to me like if it was very hard to wait until the next meal. Is that what you feel? Have you tried to distract yourself with something that keeps you busy and takes your mind off from your eating thoughts? Something you can try is to talk to a dietician so they can tell you what to eat in between meals. In that way, waiting to the next meal might not be that terrible.  Regards Alma

_admin_moderator
Medical symptoms

Hi CASACERA. We’re so glad you’re posting on the forums. You mentioned some medical symptoms, and we encourage you to speak to a medical professional about what you’re experiencing to try to help you feel better. The following are just some of the signs of a serious problem that demands immediate medical attention: 

  • accidentally or deliberately caused themselves a physical injury
  • become suicidal
  • confused thinking and is not making any sense
  • delusions (false beliefs) or hallucinations (experiencing things that arent there)
  • disoriented; doesnt know what day it is, where they are or who they are 
  • vomiting several times a day or has uncontrollable vomiting or diarrhea 
  • experiencing dizziness or fainting spells
  • too weak to walk or collapses
  • painful muscle spasms
  • complaining of chest pain or having trouble breathing
  • blood in their bowel movements, urine or vomit
  • a body mass index (BMI) of less than 16
  • an irregular heartbeat, and fast heartbeat, or very low heart beat (less than 50 beats per minute)
  • cold or clammy skin indicating a low body temperature or has a body temperature of less than 35 degrees Celsius/95 degrees Fahrenheit 
  • experience dizziness, nausea, fever
  • wounds/cuts heal slowly
  • feel tingling in the hands or feet
  • blurred vision 

Seek medical help soon on an outpatient basis if you: 

  • have significant heartburn and/or a burning sensation after eating 
  • have other gastrointestinal concerns 
  • have high blood pressure 
  • struggle with significant joint or muscle pain 
  • have difficulty sleeping (falling and/or remaining asleep) 
  • struggle with fatigue, sudden weight gain, and/or hair loss 
  • have frequent urination or unquenchable thirst 
  • have gained and lost significant weight repeatedly 
  • have gained significant weight in a short period of time 
  • struggle with chronic diarrhea or constipation 

The NEDA Helpline is also available for help finding other ED support resources. The Information and Treatment Option Helpline number is 800-931-2237 or there is a chat function on this website to discuss support options. Helpline phone hours are Monday-Thursday 11am-9pm ET, Friday 11am-5pm ET. Helpline chat hours are Monday-Thursday 9am-9pm ET, Friday 9am-5pm ET. We wish you the best, and please continue to post!

NEDA is here to support you during the evolving COVID-19 outbreak. The health of our community, especially those who are most vulnerable to the virus' serious complications, remains paramount. To access resources that can provide free and low-cost support, please click here.

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