National Eating Disorders Association

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iwanttolive
THE SCALE

Hello friends,

I just want to say something about that scale. Even typing the word makes the word seem strange. I can not explain that one. But what I do know it that it is addictive. I have mostly stayed away from the scale because I don't want a number to define me and I do not want anything to control me or hold more importance to me than what God says about me. I bought a scale the other day, knowing that this was not a good decision. Things have been really challenging for me and I said to myself, "Self, you need to get a scale and start losing weight". Well that voice is wrong. It is stepping back into the bondage of the eating disorder world and to a place I do not want to go to. I have to hide it so no one knows I have it. That in itself is telling. So why did I buy the scale, knowing how dangerous it is and how deceitful I have to be owning it? Or it owning me more better said.

In my past, weighing myself x times a day brought safety in a sick way. It doesn't bring safety. It causes harm. In my weakened state, I thought that it would help me, yes, have a form of control since everything around me seems to be spinning out of control. But it isn't the type of control I want or need. I am at a good weight. I don't need to lose even though I don't like the "number". But what is a number and why is a number so important? Good question. I ask you to ask yourself that same question. A number is a number. It will not own me or dictate to me my worth and value. So the scale will stay in its hidden place and I choose to not have it take over my life again. I choose to allow my body to stay at the weight it likes. "It is for freedom that Christ has set "me" free, stand firm then and do not let yourself be burdened by a yoke of slavery" Galatians 5:1. I have a choice. Will I allow myself to be in bondage to the scale or stay in the freedom that Christ has given me. I choose freedom over bondage.

I choose to not go backwards but stay in a place where God can use me and where I can have a clean conscience. "I will not die but live and declare the works of the Lord" Psalm 118:17. This is my life verse. I declare that I do not need to be ruled by a number. I want the freedom that comes from being liberated from the scale.

I hope that my writing this recent experience with you here that it helps some of you to know your value apart from the scale, apart from a number. We are so much more than any number.

Thank you for taking the time to read this. I wish you a peaceful day.

iwanttolive

Miggi
Great job! You've come so far

Great job! You've come so far, you should be very very proud of yourself! I have yet to break the habit of weighing in with the scale, but your post inspires me. Keep going and conquering your ED!

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