National Eating Disorders Association

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Hi everyone. I’m 15 years old and have had an eating disorder since I was 8. I was hospitalized last summer and sent to an inpatient facility. I was finally discharged a couple months later, but feel like I’m worse than went I was admitted. My physical symptoms are much better, but mentally I feel worse. I don’t have a support system at home so it’s really difficult for me to ask for help. My older sister is the only one I can confide in, as she has struggled with mental health illnesses, but she is now away in college. I’m really done hating myself, but I can’t seem to be able to stop unhealthy habits and behaviors. Any tips on fighting urges for behaviors?

i feel you

I am so sorry you are feeling this way. Coming out of treatment is hard. I, too, have experienced simmilar feelings when I was discharged. Everyone thinks you are fine because the physical signs are not there, but the mental ones are still very much present. Perhaps even worse than before. Is there someone at school who you would feel comfortable taliking to? Maybe a counselor or a trusted teacher? I do not know how your parents are around this, but it can be very hard to ask parents for help regardless. Maybe see if you and your sister can talk to your parents together. See if they will let you speak with a therapist that works with eating disorders. Or, I find it helpful to write a letter explaining how I feel. That way they can read and understand how you are feeling, while you dont have to say anything. I know from experience how hard it can be to deal with this on your own. But no one should have to do this by themselves. The NEDA help line is also a great resource for how to help. Again, I am so sorry you are feeling like this. Please hang in there, because you are worth it.

I understand

I totally get it. Even though I didn't get my e.d. till just recently (I'm 43), I've struggled with mental health issues since I was 12, due to PTSD stuff. I agree with meerkat, that if there is a counselor at school or teacher whom you trust, that would be great. Or if you have a close friend whom you trust and "gets it," that's great. I didn't have any of that, nor did I have parental support. I do, however, have a very strong spiritual faith. So, I was able to turn to Jehovah God, all the time, and I quite often went to the elders in my congregation, when I needed an extra moral boost, or an encouraging word, to help me get through the tough times, when I wanted to act on certain harmful behaviors. I'm basically telling you this, in order to give you some ideas, in the hope that you will find someone who can get you through your tough times. And you can always chat with staff on the NEDA hotline, as meerkat said, and of course, you have us!! :) take care <3

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