National Eating Disorders Association

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alwaysthinking
Worthless

Today has been awful. I've given in to entirely too many disordered behaviors, primarily because I feel completely worthless. I feel like a complete failure. I feel like giving up entirely. I'm tired of my trauma history ruining everything. I'm tired of living in the past. I feel like I should be able to get past all of this and be better by now. I feel like I'm failing everyone I love. I hate that I just can't reconcile eating properly with feeling worthy. They shouldn't have anything to do with each other. And yet, I'm struggling with it daily. I don't know what to do anymore.

CASACERA
dear AK you said the key word

"history". If this is not the place where you to talk about your "trauma". What have other's professional or not suggested ways to accept it, since history is not now? I believe my "disordered eating" hurts myself most of all. You never said "hmmm I think I will have this disorder", right?
Is there anything you can do to make yourself feel better this evening? CC

_admin_moderator
Resources

Dear alwaysthinking, We’re sorry you are feeling upset and hopeless right now. The NEDA Helpline is here for support and can be reached at 800.931.2237 or chat with them online (http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/helplinechat) M-TH 9-9 EST and F 9-5 EST. Since you mentioned some concerning feelings we wanted to post some resources in case you need support through these thoughts.  

Please take care.

lovetowrite81
Alwaysthinking

Hi Alwaysthinking-

I'm sorry these feelings have been strong recently. I can definitely relate with thoughts of 'I should be past this by now' and when I become overwhelmed with those thoughts, try to remind myself that it's okay to be where I'm at in my recovery journey and even if I'm not where I'd ideally like to be yet, it's all part of the process. It's okay to continue to struggle and work through these things- eating and worthiness are so intertwined, and those deeply engrained beliefs about our worthiness don't often improve overnight. I just want to remind you that regardless of where you are at, you are of tremendous worth and you are not a failure. I'm sorry it's been so difficult- we are here for you <3

darkangel88
Alwaysthinking... I wish I

Alwaysthinking... I wish I had some profound words to show you your worth and make all your problems disappear, but I don't. Instead, I'll tell you that the exact words you wrote ring in my ears constantly. You're not alone in your feelings and your struggles. I'm truly sorry you are going through that right now and I send you all the love and good vibes I possibly can. Hang in there. You ARE worth it. <3

London1621
Hi

Sending you hugs. Hope you are okay.

London1621
Hi

Sending you hugs. Hope you are okay.