National Eating Disorders Association

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alwaysthinking
Panic

Just ate supper, even though I really wasn't wanting to, and now, I'm in major panic mode. I'm freaking out beyond belief, and I am wanting to do something that I know is not good for me. I've been talking to my best friend to try to help me get calmer, and I'm still freaking out and having those urges. I feel totally defective and like such a failure. I'm so tired of this.

lovetowrite81
Alwaysthinking

Hi Alwaysthinking-

I'm so sorry you are struggling this evening. Just want to say that you are not a failure for struggling- battling ED is not easy and having challenges in recovery is not a reflection of who you are. I think you are incredibly resilient and courageous and wonderful. I'm glad you reached out to your best friend and hope that you continue posting here & know that we care about you. You're not alone <3

Blue44
alwaysthinking

How are you today? I am glad that you reached out for help last night by talking with your best friend and posting on the forum. I hope that today will be better for you. Let us know how you are doing.

alwaysthinking
Awful

I've managed to stay on my meal plan so far today, but I feel awful. Having a lot of ugly thoughts. (About myself) I'm trying so hard, and I keep wondering if it's even worth it, or more accurately, if I'm worth it, which is what I struggle with on a daily basis.

jester
alwaysthinking

I'm sorry youre struggling. I'm proud of you for sticking to your meal plan even though youre scared - pushing through the fear is what you need to unlearn those fears.
Personally when I am struggling with eating disorder thoughts that I can't convince myself out of, I watch Tabitha Farrar's youtube channel... Sometimes it helps a lot to hear somebody just firmly saying to eat anyway. Sometimes it can't get rid of the thoughts. But it never hurts.
You've got this