National Eating Disorders Association

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hermione3
facing difficult issues

Really rough therapy session...its always hard to delve into the emotional abuse of my parents and what role they play in my eating disorder like how on vacations we will eat not in a like really normal way yet my parents are aware of my eating disorder and should know I have to eat more. My therapist pointed out a lot of things that just hurt and like she said with my sexual abuse it is easier to see it is wrong. my parents are like underhanded almost like it sneaky ways that they get to me and how they act and also with my eating disorder I always wanted them to notice me and they still don't. when I was really sick my friends brought me to the hospital not them. It's a tough subject and she pointed out things I know but it made me cry it was just hard to hear it and she really thinks I need to spend less time with them because my other abusers are out of the picture. my parents even if they can seem ok and things are ok it is not real it is fake and full of lies. it was just so hard and I have weekend plans with them for my birthday and my it is against treatment advice. it was just really hard to hear those realities and she thinks I will be able to let go of my eating disorder if I don't keep letting myself get retraumatized. like other abuse I can see the emotional stuff far more difficult to like pinpoint and say it is that bad. but my therapist said it is that bad and the more we talk about it she sees it.

iwanttolive
hermione3

Hi there. I am really sorry your parent's are causing you so much pain and your family situation. And you are right, the truth does hurt sometimes, but hiding and shoving the pain and reality of our situations hurts even more as healing can never take place when we are trying to hide. When things brought into the light, the darkness has to flee.

I felt that I needed to be sick to be able to live. That is messed up thinking. Survival thinking, until we learn a different way. And it is a journey. A process as you well know.

I am sorry for your pain. Of your family not being a "family". I do understand that all too well. But when you can, you can move into an affordable apartment and hopefully get some space. Just keep at it. Warm wishes sent your way.

iwanttolive and I am

hermione3
Thanks for the support. It is

Thanks for the support. It is difficult to face these issues and I know them but when she puts them out there it’s hard to hear and a hard reality to accept. I was very upset last night and just trying to keep on track with doing what I am supposed to do with food and so far today I have I still have more to the day and forgot to pack my afternoon snack so going to eat that later I am back on my normal hours and I had been eating my snack at home on my coteachers hours. I also have to stay late at work to help two teachers with stuff which I was asked last minute. I will have to cram it all in when I get home.

alwaysthinking
Not really sure what to say

Not really sure what to say other than that I feel for you and I'm here for you. I hope that's enough.

hermione3
Thank you that is enough so

Thank you that is enough so thank you so much just having such a hard time with it all like I have know most of what she has said for a long time it’s when it really hits me like last night. People think my family is so perfect and really it’s far from it. The truth just hurts

_admin_moderator
Resource

Hi, hermione3. Just wanted to post up a resource in case you want to talk to someone in relation to this post.

Please take care!

hermione3
Thank you

Thank you