National Eating Disorders Association

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had a good day

I had a great day at work, filling in for a counselor at the outpatient drug and alcohol rehab where I also work as a counselor-intern. I led the 3 hour group on my own, with over an hour of education and over an hour of process group. This is the second time I've led a group on my own and the first time I actually wasn't nervous and felt confident and self-assured. My ED behaviors are still non existent and my recovery is going great. I find this job is building my self-esteem and I am actually competent enough to be an effective counselor. When I started this job about 5 months I was terrified at the thought of leading a group of clients by myself and was certain I would not be able to handle it as my co-worker has a PhD. and over 30 years of experience, and the clients were paying a lot of money expecting expert guidance. I did not think I was smart enough to handle it but my co-worker encouraged me and told me that he believed I could do it. I am so happy I did not quit and give up because now I am doing it and actually believing in myself after over 34 years of self-doubt and insecurity. I am also in recovery for my own drug addiction which is also going great as I have worked through the 12-steps several times and live my life with the steps as a tool to manage day to day challenges. So I thought I would share some good news on this forum instead of just being sad about my boyfriend who is in prison. I don't know why he never calls anymore but I am trying to live my life on my own and with confidence without having to depend on him for all of my happiness. Of course I still feel sad and wonder if there is a good explanation for his silence, but if he's leaving me I have to survive without relapse and that means finding another way to be okay if I can't have his love fulfilling that any longer. For today. I am feeling happy, not acting out with ED behaviors and drug free, that's really a miracle. Thanks for listening and for all of the supportive feedback I have received when feeling down. This forum really helps when things seem to be hopeless and I feel lost.

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