National Eating Disorders Association

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Chandos
When can I trust my child again?

My teen has been suffering from an eating disorder (brief period of AN and now bulimia) since April. As we all know, ED is a very sneaky and deceitful thing. I feel like I spend my life always being one step ahead of my daughter by figuring out her tricks. Every time my instincts go haywire, I find something (engaging in behaviors, tools for quick weight loss, etc). I’m always doubting her and that’s a horrible way to be thinking all the time.

I love my child and I’m working hard to get all the help she needs. It’s exhausting at times and I’m full of confusion. I wish there was some light at the end of the tunnel. At what point can trust be gained back?

claire_bear
NEDA Resources

Hi Chandos, I'm sorry to hear you are having a tough time with your daughter's eating disorder. Learning how to navigate through an ED is very difficult for both the person with the ED and those who love them, like you as a parent.

NEDA provides a lot of great resources for both the person with the ED and those in support roles. Have you looked at the Parent Toolkit? It explains a lot of concepts and offers good advice, such as encouraging a loved one to seek professional help and how to talk to a loved one about their ED. You can access it under "Resources" here: https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/help-support/parent-family-frien....

I hope you find the support you need for yourself and your daughter.

jklexi1
trust

while encouraging a minor child with a potential eating disorder is a great idea, it is ultimately the parents responsibility to seek professional help. My 14 year old has been in a treatment facility since Jan 8, 2018 as out patient treatment was not enough. I encourage you to persue an eating disorder specialist in your area and start there. ED is loud and sneaky and will do what every necessary to isolate your child, it is our responsibiltiy although very scary and overwhelming to step out in faith sooner, rather than later.