National Eating Disorders Association

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fed up

My sister from California is trying to tell me what to do, how to be fair to her and how she is still adjusting to moving in. She has no idea of the truth because my sister lies and is abusive. Now my sister in CA is trying to control me and as usual, I am the bad guy and I am always wrong. All my life. Growing up into my adult life. Me. Always wrong. I told her I would not talk to her anymore about Mary and how much I am destroying my parent's health and happiness. I may never hear from here again.

She wants to mediate from California. How is she supposed to do that?

Thanksgiving dinner went well. I am not self harming anymore.

I have never been liked by my sisters. The one just left me a last text and said I am going overboard and she will not be involved anymore. I believe this means in my life. She never has time anyway as she is super busy and has never had time for me.

I want this to stop.I have suffered so much they don't even know about. I am the trouble maker in the family. The one who causes my parent's such grief. The one who is always wrong. I am tired of living this way. My parent's are supporting me and are telling her she has to leave. My not being here will make everyone but my parent's happy. If it comes to it and I can't handle it I will call for crisis for help.



Hello iwanttolive. Your post has been slightly edited to more adhere to the community guidelines and so as to lessen the chance of triggering any other users. As always, said guidelines can be found here: Thank you and please continue posting.

To be honest

I really don't know what to say or how to respond in a helpful way, other than I'm sorry and am praying for you. To be honest, for me, maybe because of my past, it's a little overwhelming to continue reading about the way you view yourself because I've been there and am struggling with my relapse at the moment, but I hope you get some good advice on here. Are you talking about this in therapy? That's probably the best place to talk about all this.

so sorry

I apologize I said too much here. I will refrain from talking about my sisters in the future.

I didn't say

You can't talk about your sister or what's going on. I'm just saying that right now I'm not the best person to know how to give advice, particularly when you are always beating yourself up. I'm saying I don't know how to respond.

sorry for what you are going

sorry for what you are going through i don't really have great words of advice.I wish I had more to offer i cna just offer an ear and support I am sorry your family is so difficult i have a difficult family too for other reasons so I wish you all the best and take care of yourself through all this remember that. You are important and people care about you.


Hi. I am not talking bad about myself but how my sister's view me. I am being abused and you speak often of your abuse. I am a victim of abuse and while it differs from your abuse I am being abused none the less. I am doing my best to take care of myself which creates more abuse from my sisters. SO I am sorry if you feel I am beating myself up, I am not. Like I said, my sisters are and the one will be removed from the house. I am sorry I upset you by sharing. As I said I will not talk about it anymore. When one is continually put down, criticized, and emotionally and verbally attacked, I guess some of that rubs off and I take some of it on and start believing I am what they say I am. But I know I am not beating myself up and doing my best to take care of myself. Which again caused my sisters to treat me even more badly. Again, I will not upset the readers of this forum. I will deal with it on my own.

I am sorry

You are going through this. I have been gentle in my responses and was being honest about how it affects me. In saying "I am the trouble maker in the family. The one who causes my parent's such grief. The one who is always wrong." And "am the bad guy and I am always wrong. All my life. Growing up into my adult life. Me. Always wrong. " Sounded like you were beating yourself up. I appologize if I misread that. I also said others may be better at responding. But it is your choice whether you talk about the situation with your sister or not. It is not on me. In my response, I was setting a boundary. I empathize and sympathize with you. I never said anything about your abuse being not as bad as mine. I am not comparing. I'm sorry if that's the way you are taking it. Just because I said I didn't know how to respond doesn't mean I don't want to hear from you. It means I am putting up a healthy boundary for this particular post. Again, I cannot tell you what to post, or how to feel. I can only express myself and how something makes me feel. I hope things improve.


I'm so sorry for the abuse you have had to endure & for the messiness of this situation. Just want you to know that your emotions are valid- we want to be there for you as you express whatever is on your heart. How are you feeling today about everything? How do you plan to cope throughout the weekend? Please keep us updated and know we care about you <3


Hi guys/gals,
Interesting developments. My sister wants to go to therapy with me so we can get along better and I don't have to be afraid. So. My pastor most certainly will be willing to counsel us at no charge. He is a very gentle person who cares and we both know him well. Thank you for being there for me during this most difficult time in my life. I am no longer self harming and continue to not. Thank you again.

That's great!!

I'm happy you are getting counseling. Let us know how it goes.

thank you

Thank you Savedbygrace. I hope that the words we had can be forgiven and we continue to be supportive to each other. I do not want to lose the trust we have built. I hope you have a good day.


You're welcome

Yes, they can. I did a few hours of cleaning today and barely ate anything.


Hey Savedbygrace,

I hope you've been able to nourish yourself since your last post and get the nutrition that your body needs and deserves. How have you been doing since you posted?

My husband and I

Had inexpensive Ethiopian food. It was a few types of veggies. He said I barely ate anything, but it felt like a few feasts. Only about 4 weeks and 6 days until inpatient. Thank you for checking on me. My thoughts and mind are in a really bad place. It's almost easier sometimes to just not fight.